Nick Foti: You are now listening to the QuadCast, the University of Rochester’s official podcast.
[More music]Nick: Starting college is an exciting time for students, and a proud one for parents, loved ones, and family members. But dropping off your college students for the first time can come with its fair share of questions. We asked parents, students and University staff for their advice on making the transition easier.
Patty Chess: Pride and sadness, all wrapped up.
Nick: Patty Chess knows what she’s talking about. She’s the mother of three University of Rochester alumni, with a fourth set to graduate next year.
Patty Chess: It’s a day that from your child is handed to you, you hope happens. And when it does it’s really, really exciting, but it’s really sad. So you have to remember that’s the beginning of great new things, not the end of your baby’s life.
Nick: Chess is the Vice Chair of Pediatrics and her husband, Mitchell, is a pediatric radiologist, both at Golisano Children’s Hospital. They’re also experts when it comes to sending kids off to college. Their advice? Relax.
Mitchell Chess: Don’t worry, the University has done this before. They have things well covered. From an academic standpoint, every freshman floor has a freshman fellow to help with academics. From a social standpoint, every floor has a D’Lion, which is basically a social director. And then you have the RA… who is there for the housing as well as any kind of guidance the student may need.
Nick: Move In Day is a milestone parents and children will never forget. Laura Gavigan is associate director at the College Center for Advising Services. She says parents need to have faith.
Laura Gavigan: Parents, this is a big deal. This is a really big deal. It’s a huge transition, you’ve raised this kid to have the skills and everything that got them into the U of R. Trust in that.
Nick: As a new class of students heads to the University, Orientation Director Eleanor Oi says parents and children can expect mixed emotions.
Eleanor Oi: It’s a tough time for everybody. They’re starting out and excited on their next academic journey, and you’re going home, and it’s a new place for everybody where they don’t know what’s going to happen.
Nick: Katie Emmons, who graduated this spring from the University, says parents may have unrealistic expectations after dropping their children off at school.
Katie Emmons: Don’t be offended if your kids only call you for help with laundry or to ask how often they need to change their sheets and things like that, because that probably just means they’re having a great time and are making friends and making connections and are busy living college life.
Nick: Beth Olivares is the director of the Kearns Center for Leadership and Diversity. She says failure is part of the college journey.
Beth Olivares: Don’t freak out when your son or daughter has a hard experience or doesn’t do well on a first quiz or first exam. That is not the point at which to tell them to change their major or to drop a class.
Nick: This is the time to show parental restraint. College is a place to grow.
Beth Olivares: Let your child figure out how it is to be an adult in these situations, because otherwise they’re not going to learn.
Nick: Don’t panic, there are parent resources available. Dawn Bruner is the director of Parent and Family Relations.
Dawn Bruner: So as you come up with questions or concerns or you even have some anxieties as you go through this experience of dropping your student off to college, please feel free to use us as a resource.
Nick: Bruner tells parents to keep the lines of communication open with their children. While staying involved, know when to pull back.
Dawn Bruner: Be patient with the questions that you ask students so that you’re not overwhelming them with all of your questions at one time, but you’re allowing their experience, their fears, their excitement, to unfold over a period of time.
Nick: Remember Mitchell Chess, who sent his four children to the University of Rochester? He says one way to stay involved is joining the Parents’ Council.
Mitchell Chess: They have activities for the parents as far as meetings with the deans. The deans will take your input as well as tell you what’s going on.
Nick: Anne-Marie Algier will try to practice what she preaches this fall. The director of student activities is also the mother of an incoming freshman. And while she admits to being nervous, she believes she has prepared her son for college.
Anne-Marie Algier: Trust the values that you gave them, trust the upbringing you gave them, and know they’re going to make good decisions. It’s time to let them fly.
[Music begins]Nick: For the University’s Quadcast, I’m Nick Foti, Class of 2019.
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