Kelly Scull ’14, Sigma Delta Tau

I thought I knew who I was supposed to be. I thought I had it all figured out. The U of R was the only school I applied to. I knew I was coming here before I entered my senior year of high school.

Since I was about 13 years old, I was a basketball player. That’s how I defined myself. By the time I was in 8th grade I was already 5’8" and I was lanky . . . and very awkward.

The only place I felt like I could be me was on the court, so that’s what I did. I played basketball. But even after I grew into myself, basketball was still how I defined me.

When I came to college, I had two priorities: (1) do well in my school (2) dedicate the rest of my time to becoming the best basketball player I could be.

The thought of joining a sorority never crossed my mind. To me, it seemed impossible to be a varsity athlete and a sorority girl. I thought those two worlds were never supposed to collide. But they did.

Somehow I got talked into going through recruitment then a year later I decided to run for President. Oh- then for some crazy reason…I decided to run again.

Becoming a part of this community changed me. The lessons I have learned, the skills I have acquired, and the relationships I have made are irreplaceable.

When I graduate in 40 days—yes, it is that close—it will be my involvement in this community that has had the biggest impact on my four years here.

I look around this room and am amazed by all of you. The fraternity and sorority community is made up of individuals and organizations that make this University better.

But this has nothing to do with the letters we wear. If we attended different universities, the majority of us would not be in the same organization. I have invested it in because of the women in my chapter. The organization itself does not make me “ever better.” It is the women in my chapter that do.

Every day, they challenge me. And they inspire me to become a stronger leader and a better person than I was the day before.

We should not define ourselves by our letters. We as individuals and as a collective define our organizations and define our community. And together, we make this community what it is.

Yes, there are things in life that we can’t control. There will be some people who believe that being in a sorority or fraternity means that you are just like the stereotype that the media portrays. What we can do is show up. We need to make sure that we always have a voice at the table so we can define ourselves rather than let others define us.

Change is going to happen whether we like it or not. There are going to be changes to the University, changes to our own organizations and changes in our own personal lives.

And trust me, I understand that change is scary. I was scared to come to college and I am even more scared to leave. But, I have come to accept the fact that change is inevitable. There are many things in life that we can’t control but there are also many things that we can control. And that is what we need to focus on.

Nick Benjamin ’14, Phi Kappa Tau

When I think about how I define myself I always go back to some crucial moments in my life. The first would be attending the University.

I came into school without much of an idea of what to expect. Heck, I didn’t even know we had University email accounts until like 3 days after I was here. “What there is a @u.rochester.edu for me?” I was pretty lost. Kind of like a little puppy running around a new house for the first time and it runs across a floor that was just mopped and it slides across the floor and hits the wall. Yeah, that was me. Excited about the new chapter of my life that was beginning, but not really knowing where to go. But there is one thing I knew I wanted. I had this ideal of who I wanted to be and that did not match up with the reality.

I wanted to grow. I wanted to grow more than just academically. I wanted to become a better communicator, I wanted to get better at helping others, I wanted to solidify what I really stood for as a person, I wanted to become the best leader—really the best person—I could possibly become.

I found that in Phi Kappa Tau. In the fraternity I found not only friends but people who challenged me. Opportunities for leadership started coming my way and I grabbed as many of them as possible and it is in those opportunities—those times when I really wanted to say no, but said yes anyway—that I think I grew the most. I was suddenly representing more than myself. I was representing more than just a collective group of people even. I was representing the fraternity. That is the single largest driving factor that pushed me to become the best person I could possibly be. If I did not put 100% effort into something, it reflected not only on myself but others. It allowed me to become who I am today.

We have taken the opportunities afforded to us by the college, our organizations, and so many others. We have taken these opportunities and excelled. But it doesn’t end there.

One of my personal ideals on life is that you should not just ‘be’ yourself. In my mind, this entails a sort of complacency. If you’re just being yourself there isn’t growth, and without growth how can you expect to have an impact on the world or even your local community?

Instead of everyone just ‘being’ themselves, I urge everyone to always strive to ‘become’ themselves. Become the best version of you possible. Really think about your values as a person and how your actions are representing what you believe in. Think about how you are living the ideals of brotherhood and sisterhood. How do you embody the qualities of ethical leadership, service, character development, loyalty, truth, friendship, honor, virtue, diligence, learning, and scholarship?

With these in mind I’d like to challenge everyone. I challenge you, we challenge you, to combat the stereotypes. Be the best image of Greek life you can be. And make the world, ever better.